dumb dog.

so, here's an official update on our dog.
daizie pinky pan-a-cake.
i like her.
there are moments when i see here cuddled up with one of my babies and i think- this is why you are with us.
there are moments when i wonder if i can keep her another day.

she poops in my basement.
i think of her like the diggingest dog.
she doesn't understand when we take her out that her job is to potty.
she gets so excited, her tail is wagging, she sniffs, she pees... but she doesn't always poo.
and then when she's inside she's not sure what to do, so she sneaks in the basement.
not often.
but sometimes is TOO much.
i'm not sure what to do about it.

she also growls at my baby.
eve is not always gentle with her,
but, even when eve is nearby and focused on something else, daizie will go up to her and growl.
i've seen daizie nip eve's finger.
i don't like it.  and i'm not sure what to do about it.
i try petting her and telling her it's ok when the baby is near.
i've tried saying no and snapping her collar.
when she bit eve's finger i pushed her off the couch and yelled "No!"
daizie used to growl at lily also... but she has learned that lily is sweet and kind.
now they are best friends.

and, she barks at people.
when we first got daizie she NEVER barked.
well, she would bark at other dogs-- but NEVER at people.
i really thought we had the perfect, non-yappy chihuahua.
i think she was scared.
she is "coming out of her shell"... she feels safe here...
and now she barks when people come over.
i'm not sure what to do.
if i stick her in her cage, she just barks and barks the whole time.
i can put her on a leash and keep her near me and that works pretty well.
at jakob's party i just told everyone to pet her and tell her it's ok... she warmed up quickly.
she is a nice dog, she just sounds ferocious.
i also got a spray bottle of water.  if she won't stop barking we just spray her and she'll stop.
sometimes i worry that i'm giving her more mental issues.

i was whining to a friend the other day about daizie's pooing and growling and barking.
she said, "What?  You got a dog that poos and barks?  Didn't you tell God you wanted the non-pooing, non-barking dog?"
i laughed, kind of.

my conclusion about this dog?
she is just another imperfect being that God has sent me so that i can learn to love more.
she brings goodness to our home.
she brings growth to our home.
she had a hard past and has some issues.
i need to learn how to teach her and learn how to love her better.
{seriously, as i'm writing this post leah screams- "Mom!  Daizie is throwing up..." she's never done this before, i think she must have eaten something on the floor.  gumballs-- the throw up has blue, green and red specks in it that match the gumballs my kids have been sneaking from my pantry.  i start gagging as i'm trying to clean it and she is trying to eat it again.  nasty.  oh, pooch?!  what are we going to do with each other?)

i guess it is true-- nothing good in life is easy.
sometimes i just feel my life.
my home, my finances, my husband, seven children individually and collectively, my extended family, my kids' coaches, my friends and neighbors, and now MY DOG...
learning to love, connect, serve, enjoy, teach, and learn from them takes work.
sometimes i laugh that marriage is hard work.
people look at me like i'm crazy.
they may say something like, "marriage isn't hard, but being a mom is hard."
i think they must be better than me.
maybe some people have dogs that don't poo or bark.
seven claps for them!!
me, i have to learn every step of the way...
every really great thing in my life has come because i was willing to work at it.
it's hard for me to always be a nice wife,
it's hard for me to always enjoy my children,
it's hard for me to be clean and orderly in my home,
it's hard for me to go to bed early and wake up early,
it's hard for me to not be defensive with my extended family,
AND it's hard for me to love this yappy, stinky dog.
BUT
hard is GOOD.
hard has refined me and made me better.
i'm grateful for the hard.
and, i'm grateful for daizie.
daizie is NOT a perfect dog.
but, she is perfect for us.
life is all about learning and growing...  this is just another chapter in my book.

and, it's all about perspective.
i was talking with a sweet elderly woman from church last week.
she said, "your children are always so well-behaved."
i said, "really?  you think so."
she said, "i love to sit behind you and watch your kids during church.  they're perfect."
i asked, "my kids?"
i'm not just saying this... my kids are good kids-- but i never feel that they are good at church.
maybe if i were sitting a couple rows back things would look prettier.
and maybe, daizie would seem like a perfect dog too...
if i were a couple rows back.
she really is a fun little dog.
but, she is still a dog... a pooing, growling, barking kind.
gotta love it.

because of the poo, i decided we needed to take more time with daizie outside.
(we do have a fenced in yard, but if we let daizie out she just stares at us through the door-- she really doesn't understand "go poo")
this is still my kids responsibility- but i decided to "embrace the experience."
i have been taking 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes at night to walk the dog.
it is SO BEAUTIFUL outside.
i love the quiet time- just me, God and Daizie...
i'm kinda grateful for her poo, because it gives me an excuse to get out.
life is good.
now, i need to go clean my carpet.
and... read up!!

because someday you'll see me with my little dog and you'll say, "wow.  your dog is so well-behaved."
and i'll say, "really? you think so?"
and you'll say, "she's perfect."
and, i'll agree.
she is perfect.
kinda.