September 17, 2010

eight. {8}


yes, i have seen my fair share of ultra sounds.
but, OH MY!
moving, breathing, kicking, twisting... baby.
it's real.
it's ours.
it's a miracle.
and... yes, it's one.

i thought i was due around march 1st.
turns out i'm measuring more april 1st. (well, March 22nd)
{i guess my quick to swell tummy is more a sign of seventh pregnancy than bigger baby.}

seeing this baby,
hearing a strong, pounding, alive, heartbeat,
brought with it a swirl of emotions.
i think i've been holding out on the baby squeal because i lost my last two pregnancies...
but trust me, i'm baby squealing now.
oh my!  i have a real, live baby inside me!!

i was talking to one of my wisest friends this morning {sister shumway}
and she said, casually, "When your family is complete you really will know it."
And, looking at this little miracle inside me, with my husband holding my hand, i knew...
i'm not done.

i've tried so hard to bargain with God... this is it. 
NO MORE PREGNANCIES.
if you want me to have another baby, send it now.
and He answered.
one now.
and one more.
as we were seeing our miracle,
i looked at Todd and said, "Honey, this isn't our last baby, is it?"
he said, "i think we'll have one more."
i said, "8?"
he said, with a smile, "at least."
i said, "shutup."
he said, seriously, "eight just feels right.  eight feels great!"
and, i agree.

so, not that we are wishing away this sweet number 7, but i think God gave me a mini-tender mercy.
i had planned on spending my whole pregnancy just cherishing "my very last..."
and. i will still cherish these moments...
even though i know.
i have 8.

heaven help me.

13 comments:

  1. I love seeing ultrasound pictures of those due around the same time I am! I don't get to have an u/s for a few more weeks!

    On an unrelated note (and not trying to be snarky) I've commented several times here and never gotten a reply. Do you reply on the comments? I guess it's just unusual in bloggy world not to get a reply!

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  2. so excited for number seven. :) and kaite, i never relpy to others when they comment on MY blog posts. i do on facebook- but most people don't i know don't check back in with my blog to see what else i had to say about the comments. I know you can have all comments after yours emailed to you- but i really don't think that most people use that. so, it isn't that jen doesn't care- i just don't think most people that blog respond to individual comments.
    it does seem a little odd ,since if someone were to say something to my face i would comment or respond. hmm. am i SUPPOSED to respond to people s comments. now i don' t know....

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  3. Congratulations I am so excited to take this journey with you.

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  4. Katie--
    Hello!! I'm so excited to be pregnant with you! I LOVE to read your comments. um, sorry if i'm not good at blog protocol. Honestly, i don't know what it is.
    Sometimes I comment back in the comment section, but then i wonder if people read back over the other comments. Sometimes, i click over to other people's blogs... but usually people have like 4 blogs listed as theirs and i'm never sure who or how to comment back.
    so... i just try to comment to all my bloggy friends as i write a new blog. Guess that's not how it's done. I really do have a slight social phobia so commenting to other people freaks me out a bit.

    I'm sorry. And, I'm so excited that we are the exact same pregnant! It is always fun to gestate with a friend!

    on a related note... i often laugh with my friends (on the phone) because i'm not hip on abbreviations.
    namely, i had 2 comments
    one who said her DH was going back to school.
    dear husband?
    divorced husband?
    daughter's husband?
    still not sure who is going back to school, but school living i understand...
    and corrie-- what is MOA? or was it MOH? MOK?
    something like "I really think" you should have a lot of kids... but i'm totally not hip on the lingo.

    so, do i comment back to a comment in the comment section? or do i click on your name and comment on your blog?
    just so i know.

    AND... i have had a few people comment to me who knew i had visited their blogs.
    weird.
    how do you know who visits your blog if they don't leave a comment?

    i really, really love reading your comments. so i promise to get better at responding in the "right" way. teach me. :)

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  5. Congratulations!! I hope the pregnancy goes (reasonably:) well for you!!

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  6. Congrats Jen! Again, I have to say that again, you have inspired me. Thanks!

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  7. Yay, Jen. I am so excited for you guys. I am excited that all is going well and can't wait to meet #7 and guess that maybe we will get to know #8 through your blog if you guys end up leaving.

    Lately, well, all the time, I have been hoping that we will at least get a #4 but if not I will live vicariously through you. You will have lots of amazing little helpers to get you through.

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  8. IMO = in my opinion.
    I've got a blossoming texter in my home and I need to know this stuff. Texting is also the best way to communicate with my YW. They never call back when I leave a message, but will text back almost immediately, so I've had to learn. I'm more a fan of face to face/voice to voice communicating, but if I want to be connected I've got to get connected.

    8 is you. love it.

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  10. Congrats! Be well Jen...sending you lots of love from England!

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  11. Jen, when someone leaves me a comment with abbreviations I don't know (I'm also not up on texting lingo) I google "texting abbreviations" and you can look them up that way. :) And, I think most bloggers love getting comments, so don't worry about what to say - we just love hearing from you! :)

    So happy for you guys. Sad I will miss meeting #8 in person.

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