twas the night before Christmas...

today... the day before Christmas.
we have pretzel turtles cooking in our oven, a ham baking in our roaster, i'm ALMOST finished with my Christmas stockings, all my presents are wrapped, my husband and my boys are playing games at the table, my sister is curling her hair, my brother is singing along with his iPhone, my mother is on her way, my home is kid-messy, my wallet got STOLEN out of my cart yesterday at Dollar Tree... i'm a little cranky and tired and SO excited for friends tonight and gifts tomorrow...

i just read this blog, from a high school friend of mine, who just found out that their newborn baby has brain damage from a traumatic birth... their sweet angel baby.
(i hope they don't mind i borrowed a picture)
my post about Christmas eve bowling seems to pale in comparison.

really,
Christmas isn't about traditions, or gifts, or parties, or even being together.

Christmas is about remembering and feeling.

joy.

gratitude.

love.

forgiveness.

hope.

charity.

friendship.

Christmas helps us to leave our individual situations...

to remember a baby born long ago.
and remember our Savior.
and remember EVER after.

some of us may feel Christmas as we read Christmas cards, and remember friends and family that live far from us...
some of us may feel Christmas as we receive a thoughtful gift and know we are cared for...
some of us may feel Christmas as we sing by Christmas tree light...
some of us may feel Christmas as we look out the window at a star filled night or a snow covered lawn...
some of us may feel Christmas as we see true joy in the eyes of a child...
some of us may feel Christmas as we rock our sweet angel babies...
imperfect today... perfect tomorrow...
because we are loved. 
and we are saved. 
and it's a wonderful life.

i'm not sure it matters what we do today, or tomorrow...
but wherever we are-- i hope we can all FEEL Christmas.
and remember... long ago and someday.
so we enjoy today even more.

tonight, i will remember a mother, Mary in a stable, preparing with her meager means to welcome God into her life.
tonight, i will remember another young mother and father in a hospital, holding their angel baby in their arms... enjoying the time they have to hold him, not knowing what the future will bring.
tonight, i will remember my own holy births.  the 6 nights i have felt the heavens part and angels deliver sweet blessings into my life.
i will remember Christmases past, with my father, my cousins, my sister, my extended family...
i will remember the joy and the love that has always surrounded me.
i don't know what next year will hold, what Christmas 2011 will be like...
i can only imagine Christmases 10 years from now...
but tonight, i will remember and FEEL and be grateful.
O holy night!

i hope you all have a Silent Night and a VERY Merry Christmas!!
with love...