enjoying THIS moment.

it goes so fast...

my kids don't get out of school until june 15.
i have needed these extra days to really get ready to have them home.
i'm not ready, yet.
but, it's coming.
today we went with a group of friends to the fountains near the river in downtown corvallis.
with swim suits, sunscreen and friends- it felt like summer.

i have a sweet friend with four children.
her oldest son is graduating high school this year,
her youngest son is starting kindergarten next year (this is how it will be for me with Jakob and Eve).
her oldest son had been pondering 'life after high school' for sometime.
on memorial day he decided to enlist in the marines.
he will take two years off to serve an LDS mission, and the marines will help put him through school.
i could feel my friend changing... growing... right there beside me on the park bench.
her baby-- joining the marines.
her other baby-- starting school.
i asked if she was excited or sad.
she said- both.
and, as we watched our little ones splash and play in the water she said, "i'm going to miss play dates like these."
and i saw again the beauty of childhood.
i'm going to miss days like these too...

it is a fleeting time.
it is a time full of joy and wonder.

my sister talked to me this morning.
in a gentle, tip-toeing conversation she expressed her concern that i was sacrificing myself for my children.
she knows that we are the same-- we give everything for our kids.
and seven is a lot of kids.
i heard myself explain to her that it is a sacrifice-- but more than that...
an investment.
this time is hard-- it is the planting and the weeding and the pruning years.
but, this time is short.
i will harvest later.
my harvest will be bountiful.
some have done things in a different order.
MANY have waited to have children.
i started young and haven't stopped.
these days are not my own.
these days i sacrifice to serve.
but, i will have my time.
i will reap what i've sown... in a different season of life.

i LOVE being a mother.
i choose this life.
my oldest boys are both running for middle school offices next year.
they already passed the primary and are anxiously awaiting the final vote.
(wouldn't it be fun if they both won?  jakob is running for VP and drew is running for secretary)
they read me their campaign speeches this afternoon.
they are darling boys.

drew is turning 12 on Friday.
he was voted "most inspiring" on his track team.
he is graduating from primary to go to Young Men's.
(i cried as we sang happy birthday to him last week.)
my babies are growing up.
i LOVE having older kids.  it is SO fun.

my older girls love to watch the same shows i like to watch, they love to sew with me, they love to garden, they love to paint their fingernails and read the same books i love.
we have so many fun plans for the summer together.
it is so fun having girls.

and my little girls-- they are beautiful and fun and growing so quickly.
lily sat on a statue of a goose and kept saying, "Look Mom!  I'm riding a MOOSE."

leah's just fast and beautiful.
her legs keep growing longer and she is ALWAYS full of joy.
she isn't a baby anymore.  she is a girl.
she is ready for school... and i will miss her.
{i'm so glad kindergarten is only half day.}

and my BABY... have you seen my baby?
she is a toddler.
she climbs EVERYTHING!!
she wanders far.  {not all children will do that... just the feisty ones.}
she is hard and WONDERFUL.
oh the joy she brings to our home.
it makes me teary to try to explain the joy that sweet girl brings to our home.
everyone is blessed by her every day.
she brings love and smiles and energy and understanding.
we adore that baby girl.
she is our gift.

there is NOTHING i would rather be doing than sitting at the fountains on a beautiful, sunshiney, wednesday afternoon.

right here-- in paradise.

nothing.
this is the life i always dreamed of.
i am happy.

summer- bring it on!