August 20, 2014

Time Away.

Wow.
I can not remember the last time I travelled alone.

I'm so used to herding, cajoling, encouraging, counting, holding, or calling for children that walking down a corridor alone feels negligent.

I count other people's children for them.

The absolute feeling of freedom that comes from being able to potty, wash your hands, and exit a restroom without pulling curious children from under someone else's stall is invigorating.

I am only gone for a few days.
My ticket was free from the many frequent-flier miles my hubster has earned this year.
I'm meeting friends, staying with family, and generally too much of a people person to not spend the whole flight talking to the kind people around me.  And even still, I feel the peace and healing that comes when one has time to listen to the thoughts that spin inside our heads.

Take time to touch them more.  Touch daily.  Let them physically feel your love for them.

I felt this reminder as I saw an older son hug his mother tightly at passenger pick-up.  He hugged onto her tight and long while kissing her on the cheek- twice.  I could feel their love.  I want my kids to feel that love.

::hug longer

I think it's normal to have some social phobia.  I actually get all nervous talking on the phone or texting old friends to arrange "long-time-no-see" get togethers.  I pick up on awkward silences and feel like an imposition.  

One of my closest friends taught me this wise advice-- it has never let me down.

::Act as if everyone you wish was your friend already is your friend.

Almost every time I'm texting someone to arrange a get-together, my mind starts racing with feelings that I'm a big inconvenience to them.  I stop those thoughts.  I remind myself that we ARE friends and that I love them and they love me.  I push aside my insecurity and let my heart love.  It's a conscious choice.

Can I tell you how beautiful it is to let yourself love people?  
Life is designed for loving relationships.

Today I met up with old friends that I love like sisters.  I met new friends that I love like brothers.  I spent too long laughing and sharing parenting stories with my husband's cousins who are as dear to me as my own.  

One friendly plane neighbor (Hi Jimmy!) told me that if he had met me when we were both younger and unattached, I might have been able to convert him to Mormonism and convince him to have eight kids.  Ha!  What a compliment!

I really love people.
I'm so, so grateful for some time apart, in the mountains, to listen and to pray.
I love this beautiful world we live in.

I absolutely believe that we are all brothers and sisters.
If you're at BYU this week, look for me and say HELLO.  
We're friends!

Life is good.

1 comment:

Marie said...

Wow... Traveling by yourself! A year ago, you could hardly go potty without your village. Oh, Jen....so happy for you! Enjoy this time to recharge! ❤️

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