When You're Tired...

Eve got out of bed three times last night. She went into Ben's room and together they tiptoed, giggled, and hid from me. They had a little bench pulled up to the window and they were looking for daddy who was working late. 

I might normally have gotten upset, but honestly I was too tired to get upset. I gently put Ben back to bed (again), and led Eve to her bedroom. A stroke of inspiration led me to point out the frost on her window and remind her that Jack Frost was coming. I tucked her into bed, snuggled her in tightly, and told her to be very still. I tickled her face and blew on her nose, and clapped. I asked her what she wanted to dream about because sometimes Jack Frost brings beautiful, magical dreams. She was really thinking as I suggested flying horses and rooms full of candy. 

She said confidently, "I want to dream I'm a mother (mothew)." And then added with a smile, "A mothew bird with eight eggs." Sweet girl. Gentle promptings. When I went to shut her door she told me confidently that I could leave it open because she would NOT get out of bed again. And she didn't. 

Sometimes being tired helps us to rely on those gentle promptings more. I would have missed that sweet moment if I had allowed self-pity to justify anger. I agree my little Eve, motherhood is the stuff the best dreams are made of.

10 Years Ago

(This was the first house we ever owned... 9213 Solitude Lane, Belleville, MI.)

We went to visit Todd's brother and his darling family for New Years and while we were there, we went back to visit the little town where we lived just after we graduated from BYU before Todd went back to school to get his PhD. 

We moved to Michigan when Jakob was two and Drew was newborn.  Anna and Ellie were both born when we lived in Michigan.  I was 8 and a half months pregnant with Leah when we moved to Texas.  We lived there the summer of 2000 to the summer of 2006, ten years ago.

It was SO good to see the places of our past and the people who are intertwined in our memories.  

I thought of this poem...

My life is but a weaving

Between my God and me.

I cannot choose the colors

He weaveth steadily.

Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;

And I in foolish pride

Forget He sees the upper

And I the underside.

Not ’til the loom is silent

And the shuttles cease to fly

Will God unroll the canvas

And reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful

In the weaver’s skillful hand

As the threads of gold and silver

In the pattern He has planned

He knows, He loves, He cares;

Nothing this truth can dim.

He gives the very best to those

Who leave the choice to Him.

(Corrie ten Boom)

Honestly, my heart remembered people that my mind didn't.  Although we've been gone ten years, it really didn't feel like we'd been gone long.  It is so cool to see kids you knew in their youth all grown up.  We saw friends and mothers who taught me how to be a mom.  

It would be so cool if we could all do a Back to the Future run every now and then to see our now-- ten years from now.  

Yes, God is good.  I know he molds us and guides us to different places at different times in our lives.  I'm thankful for our time in Michigan, but I'm also thankful for our time in New York.  Ten years from now, we will look back on this stage of our lives with great love and gratitude.  

I'm extra grateful to be alive for today.

Life is good.