this summer i noticed that MOST of their conversations were contentious.
we talked about heavenly communication in morning devotional.
day one we decided to have a no tolerance policy.
when a kid was sassy or contentious they would get 1 minute on the bench, 2 minutes the second time, 4,6,8... it progressed as the day went on.
BAD IDEA.
the whole day was just one big fight.
the next morning we talked about our day of heavenly communication and laughed at our flop the day before.
we decided that we should take a more positive approach.
I printed out a sheet with the kids names on them...
Anytime i asked them to do something they needed to say... "YES MA'AM!!" (in a positive, happy, excited voice.)
We practiced.
After saying "YES MA'AM!!" they would look at me-- if I gave them a thumbs up they could put a star on their chart.
IF they needed to tattle or complain or argue of fight with each other... they had to WHISPER.
It has WORKED so well.
Stars = good things.
I hesitate to put a direct correlation-- 10 stars = friend over, etc.
But, I did tell them that it wasn't right that they were being sassy and contentious all the time and still getting lots of privileges.
From that they began to imagine the great things they would get with their stars.
Drew got a day at his friend's house.
The girls want a feather in their hair for 25 stars...
I LOVE hearing the positive response whenever I ask them to stop or to do something...
and I LOVE the whispered complaints... it helps me to realize that they are making an effort and I really listen to them better.
Just thought I'd pass the idea along.
In case you have some summertime brats in your house.
2 comments:
That is such a great idea. I've been handing out tickets for good behavior (just pieces of paper I cut with punches but you could use raffle tickets from the store, too, but I have tons of paper so it was cheaper) and they can use these tickets to pay for things (like the flip flops they wanted but didn't need, trips to the park, a friend's house, ice cream cone, etc.) It has helped to recognize the good. They lose tickets for bad behavior.
I need to try this, thanks.
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