Being with him makes me realize how lonely I am without him near.
I made him sit right next to me in my bed as we shared my room service dinner and watched dumb tv. I wanted to introduce him to the uplifting shows I've found- Duck Dynasty, Storage Wars, and Pickers. (He will be really happy to see that I posted the retarded picture of us... We laughed so hard at that picture that I was afraid I would go into labor.)
The hardest times for me here are saying good bye and being alone again as my company leaves.
We were able to talk for over an hour with a sweet NICU doctor and nurse. It is odd being pushed in my wheel chair down the isles of incubator babies. Most people don't get to plan for their preemie birth. I'm grateful for this time of mental preparation.
It looks like 32 weeks is a pretty safe age to deliver. I'm at 30 weeks and 5 days, my surgery is scheduled for 33 weeks 6 days... I'm just hoping to make it past 32 weeks. It is incredible what they can do to save lives these days.
They think my little guy will be around 5 lbs at delivery-- small but pretty healthy. We were able to tour the NICU and every time I'm there the babies get less and less scary to me. We met one 34 week baby that was 6lbs 4ozs. He seemed huge and healthy- like a normal term baby. Oh how I hope for this son of mine.
The NICU here has 30 babies and one nurse for every two babies. They are really set up for nursing moms, they even give you food vouchers to the cafeteria and arrange a room either at the Ronald McDonald house or a nearby hotel if you need it. I feel blessed to be here at this hospital.
I've been shopping online for clothes that I can wear after the baby is born. I'll have a catheter attached to my leg for at least a week and a vertical belly incision that needs to heal. Maybe some drains coming out my abdomen.
Plus, I'll be nursing or pumping and needing to have button down shirts for kangaroo care (skin to skin holding of my preemie). I'll be swollen and bigger than I've ever been before. I know how depressing it is when nothing fits right after you have a baby! A few fun things will help me feel good about myself until I can heal up and loose weight.
I found some cute peasant style tops that I think will work well and will make me smile. Pants were harder than shirts. I got one sweat outfit that I think will be soft on my belly and baggy enough to hide my catheter bag.
What I really wanted was some black, straight leg yoga type pants without a tight waist- cotton not spandex. Old Navy had the perfect pair-- stretchy, fold-over waist, straight fit. I love them and can even wear them now.
Shopping online is really fun for someone on bed rest for five months. Especially a compulsive planner like me. Just saying...
My favorite dentist sent me flowers. All of my kids had dentist appointments yesterday- he must have missed me. :)
Todd visits again on Thursday and another friend of mine is visiting tonight. I feel so grateful for everyone's thoughtfulness. I got the sweetest blanket in the mail from a mom who lost her own little boy. Kind, kind people. Thank you!!!!!!!
22 days till D-day.
(Yes, my delivery day is scheduled for D-day, June 6. That is also the day the Teton Dam broke in Idaho, my husband's family lost their homes. Do you know that Lily, my sixth child, was born on September 11. Ha! Good thing I'm not too superstitious.)
8 comments:
You look great and sound very positive in the midst of some trying times. I remember the lonely times in the hospital and I thought it was miserable only having to be there for two weeks! I am praying for you and that little boy.
Ha Jen! That picture made me laugh! That is encouraging to know that your baby will be in the 5lb. range! You people are in my thoughts and prayers! These are tough tough times!
Hello, I've been reading your blog since I was told I have placenta previa and my placenta looks like it's growing into my scar tissue. (except my doc seems to be taking a laid back approach, which sometimes scares me! I'm still allowed to keep doing Zumba 3 times a week, I'm 25 weeks and 5days.) I just wanted to put your mind at ease. I had my first child at 32 weeks due to preeclampsia. They had to take her before the steroid shots even had time to work. SHE WAS FINE!! She had to stay in the NICU for 2 weeks but didn't have any breathing problems, didn't have any episodes or nothing! She just had to eat with a tube that went down through her nose for maybe a week and had to be in the isolate until she could keep her temp up on her own. I will keep you and your little guy in my prayers as well as your family. God bless you!
LPiec-- thank you for your encouragement. I do think we're at a pretty safe place for this baby!! So glad to hear your baby was OK.
Zumba with previa freaks me out... Have you seen a specialist? Your doctor might be surprised when you rupture before or after delivery. The main risk with placenta Accreta is bleeding out. You could use up to 40 units of blood during your surgery so you want to be at a bigger hospital with access to a big blood bank.
Anytime you have previa with previous c-section scars, they should suspect Accreta and just plan for a difficult delivery.
Be careful friend!! I've read way too many stories of women whose doctors said they could work and didn't plan an early surgery who ended up with pretty scary hemorrhaging. Have a plan for what you will do if you bleed-- if your uterus rips (very easy to do with previa and Accreta) you could bleed out in 10-20 minutes.
My doctors never wanted me alone in case I ruptured, especially as my pregnancy progressed. Now they want me in the hospital bacause we live too far away (2hrs by car, 20 minutes by helicopter).
Good luck friend!! Hope everything works out fine!!!!
Ps-- the more specialized my doctors got, the more concerned they became because they knew what they were dealing with!!
PPS- just talked to my OB today and she said her last previa patient ruptured when she coughed. Sigh...
Oh my... I just had a cough spell for a month! After the last Ultrasound I went home and researched the whole thing and pretty much freaked myself out! I was even reading doctor boards about the subject. When I asked questions this past week she said she has never had one bleed before going in. (leave it to me, I would be the first) I asked her "So if I bleed I should go right to the hospital?" She said yes but it's very rare. She is a relative young doctor and it DOES scare me a bit that she's not so concerned. My hospital is a level 3 trauma center and I'm sure they can handle it.... But my blood type is B-. So I figure I will need A LOT of O. UGH. The hospital is close BUT I have 2 other kids and a Firefighter husband that isn't home a lot and is away for 24hr shifts! That scares me too. I read just about everything on this subject so I've prepared myself for the outcomes. My doctors point of view is that if I'm going to bleed, I'm going to bleed no matter what I'm doing. My next ultrasound isn't until around wk32-34.
LPiec- I told my doctors about you this morning. They said you need to see a fetal medicine doctor. My first OB was nice, but I kept feeling like things were more serious than she knew. Trust your gut. I felt so good meeting with a specialist who diagnosed me completely (with Accreta). You don't need to be afraid- but you do need to be wise. My doctors have alerted the red cross so they are ready with blood. When I was on bed rest at home I always had an "on call" friend, that could be with my kids or take me to the hospital if needed.
You may be fine-- many are. You may start spotting before you bleed. But- you might bleed fast and strong.
It was SO hard for me to limit my activities when I felt fine. I always took pride in how much I could still do even when I was pregnant. With this pregnancy, I was very aware of the risks. I learned a lot about preemies. Even though they can do so much with modern medicine- I didn't want to ever see my baby in an isolet and wonder if I could have done something to prevent it. I read about too many women who were concerned with their pregnancies and doctors told them they were fine- who went on to deliver tiny babies too early.
If laying down a little more, not lifting heavy things, not climbing stairs, etc., could give your baby a few more weeks inside your womb, it is worth it!!
Good luck friend!! Don't stress- but do listen to your gut that might be telling you to be aware. Accreta is something that doctors are just now learning more about. My perinatologist say anytime placenta previa is paired with previous c-section scars Accreta should be expected. (look for black placenta lakes on your next ultrasound-- your placenta will be Swiss cheesey.) if they do suspect Accreta-- just be careful. A mother died just last week in Utah from this condition.
Thinking of you!! Sending positive thoughts and prayers for a healthy delivery!!
Ps- my doctors said 25 weeks is when the risk of bleeding begins to get serious because your placenta is getting bigger. They also said they didn't want me to have any contractions- because contractions squeeze tfe placenta and could cause rupture. With Accreta, your placenta is not attached to the flexible lining of your uterus, it attaches to muscle wall. So, movement that would normally be ok in pregnancy are dangerous because instead of being flexible, your placenta will tear.
And-- no intercourse! Even before bed rest they put me on pelvic rest-- even the hormones of intimacy promote contractions and risk of rupture.
Sorry for the book!! My condition is pretty severe percretta with lots of other complications. I know you are not in the same boat. But- this is still a pretty serious condition.
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