One of my special needs students was in a wheelchair. He had severe physical disabilities and expressed himself slowly and with great effort. The chasm between the ability of his physical body and the depth of his spirit was great.
During one lesson he asked me about Christ. After sometime of him asking and me trying to understand his question, I was able to vocalize for him. He wanted to know why Christ had to suffer. Why was "suffering" a part of God's plan at all? Why did the 'atonement' require pain?
I answered him then. I'm certain my answer was a bit patronizing to this child who was years and years my spiritual senior. His question has followed me and become my own.
I still don't know everything, but I do KNOW.
Suffering is holy. Suffering for the life of one you love, is sanctifying. Suffering teaches humility and empathy. Suffering shows you your strength and ability.
I believe in Christ.
I believe suffering groomed His soul so He loves deeply and perfectly.
I believe He gave up His life for us and that He was resurrected.
Honestly, it is not His victory over death that marvels me today. I am in awe of His victory over pain and suffering.
His ability to love, his ability to transcend self.
My own suffering was mild.
I wish I could go back to that sacred space years ago. I wish I could hold my brother's shaking, crippled hands one more time, wipe the drool from his chin, and look deep into his soulful eyes.
I would tell him he is known, he is loved. That God blesses his children with opportunities to suffer because He knows what we can become. God knows that we WANT to be better, and He knows the path to better requires overcoming obstacles.
Christ suffered so He could love purely and understand. Suffering was required because suffering transforms selfish into holy.
I believe that every holy man or woman has had a cross to bear.
We are here in the "muddled mortal middle". This is initiation, this is not the end.
Happy Easter friends!
How I hope the feeling of rebirth seeps deep into your soul.
Today, I'm grateful for holy scars and sacraments.
There is more to this life than life itself.
Bask in His love! Keep looking up!
Life is good.