November 06, 2014

I create.

The healthier I get, the more I create.
My soul yearns to make things.
Of all the ways I spend my time, creating beautiful things is my most selfish.
I can't justify the time I spend making a wall-hanging.
Creating is some magical equation where 1+1 equals more than 2.  
I don't know what it is.  There is holiness in splendor.  (Holiness and evil...)

There are SO many dumb crafts out there.  So many people spending too much time and too much money on things and appearances.  There is so much wealth and worldliness.  I try to tell myself it doesn't matter what your house or your clothes looks like.  I gag at materialism and feel conflicted by disparity- million dollar homes and starving children.

I'm ok just being a normal family in an average home.  I don't even apologize for sharpie stains on my couches.

And yet, my soul craves a house that reflects my level of care.  I care about my home.  I want to invite people into my home and feel proud.  Something happens in my soul when I create a beautiful space.  A jar of flowers or a pile of squash, makes my spirit happy.  
I took this picture the other night right after dinner.  Isn't that a happy mess?  If I had the dining room of my dreams, it would look different, but just a few happy pumpkins are enough for me today.  

Most of the time, creating things costs more money than buying things, and it definitely costs more time.  
Oh, the joy that comes from making!
Don't you love a home with a mother's touch?

I have resumed my long ago habit of creating at bedtime.  Around 8 pm, when my home is tidy and my younger children are nestled all snug in their beds, I push play on my free library audio book (we just finished listening to Cinder, my big girls and I).  I have been cross-stitching these days, but this is how I used to quilt.  8 to 10 or 11 is a long time to create.  When Todd is in town, he reads while I stitch.  Since he's been gone, my girls create with me.  So, so fun!!

I just think creating and homemaking is such a perfect fit.

So much of homemaking is cyclical.  A clean kitchen is dirty again in moments.  Just holding something that you've made, that can be finished, oh it is good for the soul.

I don't know why my soul craves a beautiful home?  My sharpie couches are fine.  But, wouldn't this couch be so fun?
I'm sorry my pictures are ridiculous.
You can follow me on Pinterest (I have two accounts, look for my newer one) if you want to see the things I dream of and the sources.
Today, I'm just saying that, it's good to dream!  It's good to make things beautiful.

I believe creating the house of your dreams is a somewhat unattainable mirage.  I consider myself content and hopeful.  :)

We don't have much extra money these days.  But, a sprig of rosemary or a twig of pine tree costs so little and just brings a smile.
I bought 12 more white plates at Savers (like Goodwill) the other day for $12.  I know we can eat Thanksgiving on paper plates.  But, I'm so excited to serve on ceramic.  It's ok that I don't have beautiful china (maybe someday), I can use what I can afford and make it beautiful.
I love these curtains.

Any ideas how I can get 25 yards of linen type fabric for cheap?  And, I need curtain rods cheap.  And, I want to line them so they seam full and lovely.
This is my next project.
After curtains, my dad is going to help me build two long tables and two benches.

(I want 2 long tables-- one 120x48 and one 120x24.  I'll keep the long, skinny one behind my couch like a sofa table where my kids can color and do homework, and then use that for a kids table when we have company.)
I might never get the curtains I'm dreaming of.  Probably, Christmas will take priority.  My folding tables work fine for extra seating.  You can even get pretty cute paper plates for Thanksgiving.
For me, I know that my life will never be as beautiful as it appears in my dreams.
I know I create spiritually 100 times faster than I create physically.
But, I think it's good to hope, to dream, to have a goal, to work towards something.
I think it's good to make beauty with the things around you.

A stake president once told my husband the sweetest compliment about me.  He said, "Whatever she touches turns to gold."  I love that idea.  I can't tell you how often I've thought of those kind words as I've left my touch on the world around me.  

There is something holy in making things beautiful.  I don't quite understand it yet, but I know it.  

You know, even as I lay for months in my hospital bed, I found healing in creating.  I felt the power of doing something while my ability to do was severely limited.

I did family picture books for all the years since we've taken digital pictures.  I still can't afford to print them out (let me know if minted ever has a big sale), but I know they're there.  Finished and waiting.  That feels so good.

I started my cross-stitch.  It is symbolic to me of the first "family" project I could make knowing my family was absolutely complete.  As I stitched a little boy onto my sampler, I knew that this boy might not live.  I knew I might never finish this sampler, and yet I stitched day after day while I watched BBC.  (Holy moly, I had no idea how long this huge cross-stitch would take!!)
I love it.
I love creating.

I think that is one reason why I blog.  In a sense, I'm creating everytime I post.  In my dreams, I could write beautiful, inspiring, well-edited posts, on a computer savy, updated site that has sponsors and makes me extra money to pay copays on my kids doctor appointments and helps us go on family vacations.  But, I'm not there.  I'm here.  I'm parenting eight, young, beautiful children.  I am married to a hard-working man.  We have a beautiful home and lovely yard to care for.  (It's a lot of work if you can't afford gardeners, pool guys, lawn mowers, snow plowers, driveway refinishers, house cleaners, etc.)

I type my blogs on my phone while my babies eat 6 string cheeses each.
My time is up.  My mind is flowing and inspired to fill my blessed Thursday with a little more beauty.  

As I typed that, I glanced at my bed and noticed a chocolate drool stain on my white pillowcase.  I think I'll start by washing my bedding.  Don't you love climbing into bed with freshly washed sheets?

I believe in making things beautiful.
I believe creating is more important than having, that dreaming and planning and hoping is a good thing.
I believe that it is ok to want.  I believe that as we create things first spiritually, we will be blessed with all the desires of our heart.  In time.

We are blessed to do that which we desire.  We can create that which we dream, but we must be patient with the process.  Creating takes years not moments.

How grateful I am for these years!

(I had my six month check-up with my surgeon yesterday and he pronounced me "healed and normal".  There were times I wondered if I would ever feel that way again.  I think sometimes even God's creation takes time.)

Life is beautiful and good!
(Want to come over and make a fall wreath with me?)


L said...

I would love to come over and make a fall wreath! lol

Anonymous said...

...and you do have a beautiful gold-rimmed china service for just happens to be sitting in boxes in England at the moment...someday it will be in your home, ready to go back into action for its intended purposes...Love you! me

Kassie said...

"So much of homemaking is cyclical. A clean kitchen is dirty again in moments. Just holding something that you've made, that can be finished, oh it is good for the soul."

I love crocheting because I love that I can take a simple strand of yarn or string and create something useful that will be 'finished'.
Love your table ideas!

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