My blogger iPhone app is broken so I
can't post pictures. I do have some beautiful pictures that I'll tap into soon.
Oh how I've missed this summer.
I've missed berries and garden tomatoes. I've missed mothering and planning fun field trips. I love being a mother.
My kids haven't missed out. Fun grandmas and friends have filled their lives with summer fun, and I've missed it.
I'm so weak. I try to walk up my drive way everyday. I'm trying to eat more and figure out my sick bowels.
I'm half a mother and my soul is aching for normal. Yesterday, I changed ben's poopy diaper for the first time. He is two months old!
Todd is spending a few days at scout camp. It is so good for him and so hard for me. He is my safety net. I miss him desperately if he isn't with me.
Last night I was so sick. I kept throwing up, which makes me pee my pants, and I had a little guy that wanted to eat. It was awful- I kept hoping todd would just magically show up and rescue me. He didn't and somehow I made it through the night.
I used to be so capable. Sigh.
So much is happening these next few weeks. We are moving and my kids are starting school. I really want to take them school clothes shopping. I love back packs full of school supplies.
I saw two, beautiful horses for sale on Craig's List and couldn't help but imagine how beautiful they would look in our fields. Todd laughed at me when I told him.
I feel like I'm on the brink of normal... It's coming back slowly but surely.
I'm so grateful for the years of fun summers I've already had. Someday this summer will fade into the past... It's been a doozie.
A friend was talking to me yesterday about how she needed me time. She said her whole life was mommy time. I laughed. I'm so sick of me time-- all I want is to be a mom again. I love my normal life...
Life is so good.
I need a nap. :)