September 08, 2014

Just Sitting Here.

I'm just sitting here trying to plan my week, trying to get the gumption to get up and at it.
(Actually, that picture is from last night.  I've been stuck since yesterday trying to get rid of my cranks.)

The laundry is folded and ready to be delivered to rooms.
I want to make up a job list for the kids, put my laundry away, make bread, and make a few phone calls.
I can do this!!

I'm reminded of a friend who told me that her theme for the year is "No dumb stuff."    
Today, I have dumb stuff that is clogging my productivity and I'm cranky.
I need to "Let it go!!!!"

Honestly, in life there is always going to be something I'm not doing well and someone to point it out to me.  My defensiveness creates a perfect justification to be angry.  I need to forgive and move on!  Right now.

As a mother, this is what I've learned--
My kids are basically good kids who really want to be good.

If they are not doing something well, it's because they don't know how, they are struggling in another area of their life and feel overwhelmed, or they are struggling to prioritize many good things.
In every situation encouragement, love and help are the best responses.  They need me to see them as good and they respond as good.  Our kids need us to SEE the good in them!!!  Kids need us to acknowledge what they are doing with gratitude and they will do better.  Love or charity NEVER faileth.

The absolute worst thing I can do to a struggling child is tell that child they are not good enough.  They are already struggling with being good enough.  They need one person in the world who sees the good and inspires them to be better.
Anger and contention and pride ALWAYS faileth.
Make sense?

I have a few children who don't love dishes.  When they complain and drag their feet we can respond two ways.

First, we can be mad that this child "never" gets their dishes done, say that's it's ridiculous that "every single night" we have this same discussion.  We can bribe (with carrots) or threaten (with sticks), but we know that carrots and sticks simply don't work.  This whole approach only 100% creates a home environment of contention.  Contention and pride and anger (enmity) always faileth.

Or, we can smile, be light-hearted, and pretend we are talking to our friend.  We can treat our child like we would treat someone we respect who might be struggling.  We can agree that the dishes is a task that often looks overwhelming, but then remind them of how well they've tackled big projects in the past.  "I know you're tired!  You've been such a great help today.  Thank You!  How can I help you get started?  Let's get this done really fast so you can enjoy the rest of the night."  Love and service and kindness and charity NEVER faileth.

It works.  We all want to be seen as someone who is good- especially when we are already beating ourselves up.

A friend told me once--
Satan will tell you that you are a failure.
Heavenly Father will tell you that you are so good you can be better.

I can promise you something-- I am 100% more motivated to help and serve someone who is grateful for my service than I am someone who is ticked off I'm not doing more.  That's human nature.

Feeling like a failure only creates more failure.

Feelings of failure are "dumb stuff".
I'm a good person who can be better.
I'm trying, you're trying, they're trying.
Let's be grateful for each other.
Let's do the best we can.
Let's not use another person's weakness as an excuse to be cranky.
I'm done being cranky.
I just have too much to enjoy today.

Thank you for reading this blog.
Thanks for all you do each day for your family, for your neighbors, for God.
I know there are 100,000 things you aren't doing- and that's ok.  Just keep doing simple things.  Keep trying.  Keep loving.  Keep moving forward.
You're good- you can be a little bit better today than you were yesterday.
We all can.
I love you.
God loves you.
Life is a gift-- we are here so that we can be happy!!
Feel the joy!!

Today, I am content in my childhood.
I'm content in my children's childhood.
I'm content in your childhood.

Today, I'm not going to think one whit about what I should of or could of done differently yesterday.  I'm just going to make the next right choice.
I'm going to DO GOOD.
I'm going to serve and love and smile.
I KNOW I'm not perfect, you're not perfect.  I make mistakes and I'm glaringly incompetent sometimes.
But- I'm trying.  I'm becoming better.
God is helping me to be a more profitable servant-- and that's good enough for me.

If you come to my house, you will see dishes in my cupboards that have hardened food on them.  (Probably from the by-hands that I washed.)  My kids are NOT quality control dishwashers (well, the slow ones are and that is SO annoying).  But- my kids try!!  They are so helpful!!  They are learning!!  And, I'm proud of them.

I'm ready to get up and try again today.

I'm sorry that I'm not a better visiting teacher, sister, accountant, wife, daughter, meal planner, patient mother, house organizer, toilet cleaner, doctor appointment scheduler, smiling happy food faster, wedding present sender, carpet cleaner, healthy eater, barn cleaner, garden weeded, activity attender, drama calming, invite people over-er, meal bringer, dog trainer, lunch maker, shirt ironer, family history doer-- I'm trying!!!!  

I want to be better.
I'm grateful I have another day to try.
Let's ALL be patient with one another as we try!!!

1 comment:

Brooke Jones said...

Thanks! You put feeling I felt fasting and praying yesterday into words and even furthered my understanding.

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